We all know those people who seem to dive headfirst into a new relationship, spending 24/7 with a new partner, but this sometimes comes at the expense of their other relationships.
Meanwhile, other people feel like they have to fight their way on to their new partner’s schedule.
Maybe, we thought, ruling text messages out altogether would be a weird way to do that.
In the past, dating someone new would leave me drained and weirdly sad.
It was a few days after our second date, which had been a dream.
Guilt that I’d put him through the turmoil, but frustration over the responsibility of dealing with another person’s emotions at a time when I felt so drained.
On an impulse, I dialed him right then and broke things off.
He said that he thought it was strange not to have heard from me, and that he could handle it if I didn’t want to continue seeing him, but he just wanted to make sure I was okay.
I remember emerging from the subway, seeing his words fill my phone screen, and feeling flooded with both guilt and frustration.The difference, of course, is that texting your best friends is a fun diversion, whereas texting someone you’re interested in can feel exhilarating but also exhausting. But the good-morning-how-was-your-day-goodnight banter — and the incessant distraction that came with it — all of that was off the table.